Dating and waiting have become more distant friends than we use to know.Love Photo Gallery

Waiting has for a long time been a fundamental part of the dating and love process. It has for centuries served as indicator of a persons interest in us as well as the guarantee in the quality of a the relationship. Soldiers prayed to go back to the arms of their wives, women prayed for the safety of their beloved, sojourners relished the prospects of seeing a lover they had been with In the course of their adventure and sometimes they would sail great seas and oceans in the attempt to seeing them again. Everything worked naturally in teaching us that waiting and patience was all part of the process.

Time use to both play a key role in every phase of a romantic affair or love story, from communication to the first night of sex, we were all conditioned to go about our business as usual until the postman knocked on our door to deliver a reply of a letter we wrote to our beloved.

Religion and certain traditions also at some point inculcated in us the convictions of marriage before sex and some people even bore harsh consequences for going against some these believes in those days.

Today a whole lot has changed since then and we have learned to define love and dating in as many ways as there are people on earth. But the big question is;

How has time impacted dating today?

The plethora of dating sites, the internet, apps and especially our multi-choice mentality today have greatly influenced our ability to concentrate or wait for anything around love, dating or sex.

While some men want to jump on the cookie sooner than they could wait, some women on the other hand have grown obsessed about their biological clocks so much that they are almost convinced that a man can jump into committing to them after 2 dates. Today everyone seem to put forward their personal needs above the very human nature that engineers love and dating.

Unless she’s a commercial sex worker who would do it for the money, no woman really wants to open her legs to a man she barely knows and also bear in mind that no man wants wants to commit to a woman he barely knows either. As men, the idea of having multiple partners or easily accessing sex when we want, dont imply that every woman should want to have sex with you on the first date and if they dont you should automatically put them on the « Next » swipe or on your ghosting list.

You should learn that your ability to detach yourself from a woman’s sexuality and show indifference would greatly increase your success in not just dating but in dating high-value women. High-value women are women who have risen from the limiting status-quo, and while they understand the importance of having a superficial self-care routing they also priorities other aspects of personal development. I am not just talking about career women here, as there are some career women who havent still taken a minute to appreciate their hard work and diligence or the time to celebrate the result of their labor, because they have always felt something was one thing missing in their loves ; A Man.

It takes much more to be a high value-woman. It takes One who understands when to take pleasure and when to be more « serious ». A high value woman wants a man, she also understands the relevance of a man in her life without necessarily « Needing » a man and viceversa. This is what makes the difference.

Needing Vs wanting a Man or a Woman

When you want a person, you dont put your life on hold for them, rather you show them everyday how beautiful your own life is and then inspire them to fine a place and a role in that beautiful life of yours.

It is not to say that you should go about flaunting your autonomy or overemphasizing independence when you meet a person. Doing this would turn your potential partners off as every one seek a minimum of relevance in the life of the other, especially when they are genuinely interested in you.

When you need a person, you are more likely to act in desperation towards them, as your instincts will kick in and push you to show them your urgency of the kind of partner or relationship you seek.

Bear in mind that humans are more attracted to progress, if your life appears to be composed and calm, you automatically attract partners or people , but if it suggests chaos and seems unsettled, then you become an apparent liability, no body wants a liability in the name of romance except for people who have a tough time being alone and would settle for anything.

When you show you want a person rather than needing them, you create a place for them in your life, but then you also set boundaries for them. This would always communicate and show that you are emotionally stable and reliable, and it would also give your partners a sense of responsibility, a positive role to play in your life.

« To Whom much is given, much is expected… »

Luke 12:48 from the Christian bible verse.

How Should You Manage Time In A Relationship?

Learn to see time more like a positive element in the evolution of a healthy relationship rather than a constraint. Every beautiful thing in nature takes time to yield. From plants and animals, to the butterfly in its cocoon.

A man or a woman who has just enough going on their lives will find it easier to apply these principles or exercise some level of patience because in fact, there really isn’t such an urgency to be in a relationship with anybody for any reason, if and when we operate in self-love and if and when we have a positive self-image.

When you talk to a person or chat over a dating website, make sure to communicate clearly the pace you wish for things to evolve at and dont let anyones sense of urgency put you under any form of pressure whatsoever.

Remember good things take a lil bit of time and we are not just products on the shelves of a supermarket with descriptions on labels and nutritional value. We need time to express and evolve into our better selves in any relation, not just for ourselves but also for our partners.

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